I LOVE MY FAMILY

Today I am super thankful for the amazing family I have been blessed with. I am so thankful that when I am with them, I feel at peace. Thank you thank you thank you God.

About my Best Friendster

"A friend is one to whom one may pour out all the contents of one's heart,
chaff and grain together,
knowing that the gentlest of hands will take and sift it,
keep what is worth keeping...

...and with a breath of kindness blow the rest away."
- Arabian Proverb

From my Best Friendster

With that moon language
admit something
everyone you see, you say to them 'love me.'
of course you do not do this out loud, otherwise someone would call the cops.
still, though, think about this, this great pull in us to connect.

Why not become the one who lives with a
full moon in each eye that is always saying,
with that sweet moon language,
what every other eye in
this dying world is
dying to hear?"
-Hafiz (medieval Persian mystic)

I am about to go to sleep. I just came off of watching about 1/2 hour of TV that really frustrated me and got me thinking. As one of those girls who is genuinely happy with themselves (minus a few small details), I rarely allow myself to sink into any sort of self-pity or self-loathing. However after this TV session I can't help but feel incredibly annoyed. I flipped between a news special on escort services and a show about Playboy models (ok I probably should have steered clear of both of these, but hush). I felt like I was just completely bombarded with negative thoughts and images about myself as I watched.

I will never look like those girls.

I hate it that when I date someone, these are the girls they will find attractive, and not girls like me. I hate it that these are the standards of beauty in our society. I hate that I have to convince myself that someone will love me despite my looks.

Please God let there be good men out there still.